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A Difficult Woman

If another person asks me the same question again
are you a good girl or bad
i am not a girl and there isn't any good or bad
who are you to tell me if i have a choice
 
If another person will bring up the same comment again
you aren't smiling back enough
the smile disappears, you went too far
i will smile when I want to laugh
 
I don't feel shame anymore
i am a difficult woman, i am a difficult woman
even during a whisper you know that i already feel
how much you all fear me
 
If another person will put me in front of others
will tell me that they bring me troubles
I will smile at him with love
they are sisters at the same party
 
If another person will tell me that you can't
that your voice is dangerous to be heard1
my song runs, plays for him in my voice
you can't stop me, can't stop me
 
I didn't want to talk about this, i wanted to go
but they are in the mud and i am the one getting dirty
who am i, who am i, what am i, what
mirror on the wall, full of amazement
i am like this like i am, what is crazy about this
if everything is possible so i won't relax about this
i didn't want to be a headline, yes allowed, not allowed, the most beautiful, not talented
it's all or nothing in the end, i don't have what to dare, this is the fire that is in me in any event
and i have compassion and love within in the face of the fear
I don't feel any shame saying it this way
 
I don't feel shame anymore
i am a difficult woman, i am a difficult woman
also during a whisper you know that i already feel how much you all fear me
 
  • 1. ultra-orthodox men in Judaism are prohibited from hearing the singing voices of women other than their wife and children


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01.02.2025

REBORN





Tears dissolve under the rain, wandering on the path of rebirth beyond the pain.
 

Can you hear cry your heart?
Let me hear cry your soul!
No pain! no gain! Don't fear.
 

Unable to look ahead, stopped and blocked by fake days, a facade of 'once more dice.'
 

Can you hear cry your heart?
Let me hear cry your soul!
No pain! no gain! Don't fear.
 

The reality soaked in the rotten rain is still a false breakdown.
This pain will eventually turn into a white future.
With a soul that needs no adornment, dye my heart and find me.
Livin' on the chaos.
 

Can you hear cry your heart?
Let me hear cry your soul!
No pain! no gain! Don't fear.
 

If you're afraid of the past and not seeking ahead, it won’t begin – a cloudy smile.
With this sorrow in my chest, toward the sky where light shines.
With a soul that knows no fear, open your eyes and find me.
 

Livin' on the chaos.
 

The rain wets my eyelids, showing the path ahead of pain as I walk the path of rebirth.
 


01.02.2025

Mayfly





I think you were sometimes an egoist.
The smell of cigarettes and those words still linger in the classroom.
 

I can't throw away this dark past.
I can't throw away this terrifying present.
 

Why did you disappear?
That psychopathic smile of yours...
Why must the life of a mayfly be short?
Why did you disappear?
That psychopathic smile of yours...
 

You're always there in my memories and in my heart, I won't forget.
Even if my heart hurts,
Even if I feel the lessons,
I’m happy for the things you left behind.
 

Why did you disappear?
Why did you disappear?
 

The smell of cigarettes and those words still linger in the classroom.
Sleep peacefully, I’ll leave it to you.
I’ll carry your thoughts with me.
 


01.02.2025

fu uh





Still, I haven't given up. Is it the same for you?
 

I think the world is small.
 

No matter how dark the place is, I can hear the music. In the attic with my eyes closed, I feel you.
 

Hoo~
 

Can you sleep tonight? I want to see you.
 

A necklace shining around your neck.
 

The things you gave me.
 

Suddenly, I think like this: I like the air outside, swaying. Even though there's a different, opposite side of me, I feel hope.
 

Hoo~
 

I'll stay in my heart.
 


01.02.2025

-045-





In front of the phone, I was searching for words
I just wanted to say one word, 'Congratulations'
The love that disappeared last year
Your birthday
 

Gently, 045
Just the area code
I dialed and placed the receiver
But no, tears started to overflow right away
 

A quiet dream, you told me about it
The café on the hill overlooking Marine Tower
The seasons slowly
Melt away like water
 

Gently, 045
I entwined my fingers and walked
The mirage-like hill
The foreign ships swaying in the blurred sea
 

Gently, 045
Someday, to you
I want to smile
And say thank you from the bottom of my heart