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At Seventeen

I still know how it was at seventeen,
At home I was still the child
That was allowed to play and win
And that got hugged.
 
But outside it was different
The men saw the woman in me
And asked: 'Do you want to go out with me?'
At seventeen I didn't know anything for sure.
 
Often I stood there and wasn't allowed to
With the words: 'Don't forget about school!'
I waited by the Telephone
For someone who'd say: 'I'll take care of it!'
The world seems to be as wide as the sea
And yet as narrow as never before
One has to understand a lot of things anew
At seventeen!
 
I learned that for the pretty girls
It is easy to find a boyfriend
That thinking is not important
While you are waiting to be happy
 
Like the evil queen in the fairy tales
I stood in front of the mirror so many times
And asked him how beautiful I was
At seventeen I was a queen!
 
With the dubious certainty
To gain success and happiness this way
You move and turn
And you believe that you have to be
Like the friend, who is already wearing the ring
Like the star, who's giving autographs
Often I remained lonely
In this glamour
 
Time is like a big market
Who's got something to offer will be chosen
Sheltered you're shown off
They bargain for the highest price
 
That's long ago and still well known
I ask myself how I survived it
From dreams to reality
It was a long way!
 
Today I see girls passing by
Who face life upright
Who don't take the glamour for the truth
Who know and say where they are going
And when they turn around to face me
Can't understand my joy about this
Going new ways
At seventeen!
 


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01.02.2025

REBORN





Tears dissolve under the rain, wandering on the path of rebirth beyond the pain.
 

Can you hear cry your heart?
Let me hear cry your soul!
No pain! no gain! Don't fear.
 

Unable to look ahead, stopped and blocked by fake days, a facade of 'once more dice.'
 

Can you hear cry your heart?
Let me hear cry your soul!
No pain! no gain! Don't fear.
 

The reality soaked in the rotten rain is still a false breakdown.
This pain will eventually turn into a white future.
With a soul that needs no adornment, dye my heart and find me.
Livin' on the chaos.
 

Can you hear cry your heart?
Let me hear cry your soul!
No pain! no gain! Don't fear.
 

If you're afraid of the past and not seeking ahead, it won’t begin – a cloudy smile.
With this sorrow in my chest, toward the sky where light shines.
With a soul that knows no fear, open your eyes and find me.
 

Livin' on the chaos.
 

The rain wets my eyelids, showing the path ahead of pain as I walk the path of rebirth.
 


01.02.2025

Mayfly





I think you were sometimes an egoist.
The smell of cigarettes and those words still linger in the classroom.
 

I can't throw away this dark past.
I can't throw away this terrifying present.
 

Why did you disappear?
That psychopathic smile of yours...
Why must the life of a mayfly be short?
Why did you disappear?
That psychopathic smile of yours...
 

You're always there in my memories and in my heart, I won't forget.
Even if my heart hurts,
Even if I feel the lessons,
I’m happy for the things you left behind.
 

Why did you disappear?
Why did you disappear?
 

The smell of cigarettes and those words still linger in the classroom.
Sleep peacefully, I’ll leave it to you.
I’ll carry your thoughts with me.
 


01.02.2025

fu uh





Still, I haven't given up. Is it the same for you?
 

I think the world is small.
 

No matter how dark the place is, I can hear the music. In the attic with my eyes closed, I feel you.
 

Hoo~
 

Can you sleep tonight? I want to see you.
 

A necklace shining around your neck.
 

The things you gave me.
 

Suddenly, I think like this: I like the air outside, swaying. Even though there's a different, opposite side of me, I feel hope.
 

Hoo~
 

I'll stay in my heart.
 


01.02.2025

-045-





In front of the phone, I was searching for words
I just wanted to say one word, 'Congratulations'
The love that disappeared last year
Your birthday
 

Gently, 045
Just the area code
I dialed and placed the receiver
But no, tears started to overflow right away
 

A quiet dream, you told me about it
The café on the hill overlooking Marine Tower
The seasons slowly
Melt away like water
 

Gently, 045
I entwined my fingers and walked
The mirage-like hill
The foreign ships swaying in the blurred sea
 

Gently, 045
Someday, to you
I want to smile
And say thank you from the bottom of my heart